Jul. 2nd, 2003

jadegirl: (Default)
I'm having some trouble working a thought process out - any viewpoints offered will be gratefully accepted.

I'm trying to work out the line between being compassionate and being a 'pollyanna'. In Buddhism, there's compassion, and there's 'idiot compassion'. Like most things in Buddhist philosophy, the words are layered with subtlety, and sometimes what you think they mean isn't what they mean at all.

The idea of being a 'pollyanna' is a very culturally instilled thing, I think. Our culture has a very heavy focus on 'looking out for number one', and to hell with all the rest. However, I think there's a scale between being compassionate and being and idiot-doormat, but I'm not sure how one can tell where they are on that scale at any point in time.

I want to be as compassionate as I am capable of being, in all things. However, I know my own tendency towards doing anything I can to avoid 'fuss', which can at times turn me into a pollyanna. I'm having real trouble figuring out where these lines are.
jadegirl: (Default)
Got to giggle at Sir today. The last of my birthday presents arrived - a beautiful sculpted box, the lid is a carving of Andromeda chained to the rocks. Along with the box was a lovely pair of earrings, winged figures in silver, very delicate and pretty. Just as pretty as the exact same pair he got me for my last birthday.:) I cracked up.

Feeling somewhat scattered today, mulling over spiritual loose ends inspired by a friend questioning the workings of her relation to the divine, reading her has me exploring/questioning my own. I'm on the edge of an idea there, but it doesn't seem to want to form in coherent sentences...the bare bones of it is that I think we might relate to the divine in whatever form the divine wants to relate to *us*. There's an awful lot there to unpack, though.

Also thinking about my last post on compassion, and peoples responses to it, as you all gave me a lot to mull over. My thanks for that.

The boundaries between self and other can be so permeable at times...it can be hard to tell at moments where doing for ourselves and doing for others begins and ends. At least, it's that way for me, and I think it's one of the things that makes me a good servant, or at least allows me to take such joy in it.

Compassion can be experienced as doing for the self and am other at the same time, sometimes. Being in a compassionate space engenders equanimity, which is beneficial to the self, as well as the other. Even standing up and saying "I can't allow this to continue" engenders equanimity, as it reduces drama to a great extent.

I'm learning how to allow myself to feel ok about being compassionate in act, if not in thought - learning that that doesn't negate the value of the act. "Fake till you make it' is a useful stance, one I perhaps need more practice in in other arena.

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jadegirl

November 2010

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